# Advice for Auction gifts for a wedding social?



## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

Hey Gang,

My bride and I are having our wedding social next week, and we are really excited...Most socials have a 'silent auction' component to them. We have decided to purchase a couple of 'big ticket' items to complement the array of Gift cards and other small things that are being donated to 'our cause'  

I know for a fact that I will buy an iPod mini or Shuffle, but wanted some feedback as to what the other item could be. Any thoughts or advice from the members here would be apreciated...think around $150-$200 
thanks, 
James


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## Wolfshead (Jul 17, 2003)

What the heck's a wedding social?


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Wolfshead said:


> What the heck's a wedding social?


Exactly.


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## Cameo (Aug 3, 2004)

Sometimes called a buck and doe - stag and doe - tickets are purchased to go to the event where people donate money to play games for prizes, there is a cash bar where some of that money goes to the bride and groom, a DJ and possibly dance and lots of times an auction for prizes. The money is to go to the bride and groom to help pay for the wedding or to help start them off.
That is my understanding.


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## mrjimmy (Nov 8, 2003)

Having lots of friends from Winnipeg, calling it a social seems to be a Winnipeg thing.


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## Wolfshead (Jul 17, 2003)

Oh, I see. So a couple decides, presumably without consulting their friends, to get married. Then they want said friends to help pay for the wedding. I just find it incredibly tacky to tout for gifts and/or money.


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## Digital_Gary (Sep 18, 2003)

Wolfshead said:


> Oh, I see. So a couple decides, presumably without consulting their friends, to get married. Then they want said friends to help pay for the wedding. I just find it incredibly tacky to tout for gifts and/or money.




I don't that is exactly the intent. Usually, the bridal party and/or family put the event on. It is a big party with proceeds going to the bride and groom to be used for the wedding or towards a down payment on a house.

I think it is a fantastic idea. Of couse, I am getting married in August and our buck&doe is happening July 9th from what I have been told


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## Kosh (May 27, 2002)

It's as common thing to have a "social" in Manitoba. I think they pretty well enjoy creating a social (a dance and bar) for just about anything. It's a nice get-together and it usualy doesn't cost too much. I remember going to a few when I lived there. The silent auction is a bit new, but it's been 15 years, now since I lived there, things change.

I guess Wolfshead hasn't been invited to too many weddings, weddings are costly for the bride, groom, family and friends, no matter which way you look at it. You have to buy or rent the tuxedos, suits, dresses, gowns, etc. An extra $10 or whatever the current cost for a social ticket and drink is, isn't much compared to the rest.


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## Wolfshead (Jul 17, 2003)

Digital Gary: You've just confirmed that it is the intent. I guess inviting my friends to an event and charging them money for the privilege is simply aborrent to me. I was "invited" to a wedding last summer. I've met the people involved only three or four times in my life and was informed that the "admission" was $250 each! Kosh: You don't "have" to do any of the things you mention. Why don't the bride and groom have a more modest affair and pay their own expenses? What happend to buying your own house?


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## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

Wolfshead said:


> Oh, I see. So a couple decides, presumably without consulting their friends, to get married. Then they want said friends to help pay for the wedding. I just find it incredibly tacky to tout for gifts and/or money.


Actually Wolfshead,

We are not scamming our friends and family too make $$$. Our wedding is small, so the social provides us a way of celebrating with all of our loved ones

we are on the hook for all the liquor (charged at cost)
all the decor

not to mention the reggae band we hired, which isn't cheap. 

BTW: I started this thread to get some ideas about some possible gifts that I could PURCHASE (with my own money) to 'do up' the silent aucton better, not to have you derail the thread based on something you don't know about. 

Another case of: nothing good/ informative to say? then shut the $%^& up!!!


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## Digital_Gary (Sep 18, 2003)

Wolfshead said:


> Digital Gary: You've just confirmed that it is the intent. I guess inviting my friends to an event and charging them money for the privilege is simply aborrent to me.


I think you have missed my point. My friends and family have invited people to come for a good time and to celebrate my upcoming wedding. What usually happens is the proceeds go to to the Bride and Groom. We are not demanding our family or friends pay for our wedding or house. If they weren't putting it on, it wouldn't be happening.

And as far as having a modest afair, there are many factors beyond control. I come from a very large family as does my future wife. Unless we wanted to piss everyone off, we are having a big wedding. Having family and friends there to celebrate is important to both sides of the family. Big weddings require big money. Our families realize this and are doing what they can to help. 

I highly doubt any of our guests feel like this is a cash grab. People know how much things cost and are willing to help so that everyone can attend. If they don't feel that way, they obviously don't care much for the family and shouldn't be coming anyway.


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## Kosh (May 27, 2002)

thejst said:


> BTW: I started this thread to get some ideas about some possible gifts that I could PURCHASE (with my own money) to 'do up' the silent aucton better, not to have you derail the thread based on something you don't know about.
> 
> Another case of: nothing good/ informative to say? then shut the $%^& up!!!


Yep, it got derailed faster than you can say "You are now wife and husband, the groom may kiss the bride".

How about something non-computer (non-geek) related, like a small portable stereo or DVD player? A TV? You probably want something that either gender could use. Of course those are probably fairly popular items for auctions.


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## Kosh (May 27, 2002)

I bought this cute singing teddy bear at "Things Engraved" that's light gray with various colored shirts and hats that sings the song "Will you still love me when I'm 64" for my Mom. It fit the occasion, it was her 64th birthday and my mom gets a kick out of those singing creatures. I thing it was under $40, though. Would make for a different auction item.


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## Wolfshead (Jul 17, 2003)

But, thejst, surely the object of the exercise is to make money, otherwise you'd just invite some friends around to your home and have a party? My intent was not to derail the thread - I really didn't know what you were talking about. Now I do. This is a forum. Don't post if you don't want a reaction. Threads are constantly being derailed. Anyway, it looks like yours is back on track.


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## Digital_Gary (Sep 18, 2003)

Poker is hot right now. Maybe a nice Texas Holdem set. A good car washing kit like the Mr. Clean Auto dry. Depending on what your guests like to do, try getting some stuff that would appeal to them. If you have lots of people that go camping you could get some fold up chairs or thermarest mattress'


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## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

Wolfshead said:


> But, thejst, surely the object of the exercise is to make money, otherwise you'd just invite some friends around to your home and have a party? My intent was not to derail the thread - I really didn't know what you were talking about. Now I do. This is a forum. Don't post if you don't want a reaction. Threads are constantly being derailed. Anyway, it looks like yours is back on track.


see you at your next thread then....


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## Cameo (Aug 3, 2004)

My sister is having a buck and doe and they are asking anyone who WANTS to
- to bring a scratch ticket - all the scratch tickets are then taped to a large piece of bristol board and this will either be an item for the auction or a prize - not sure.
For any of the games there will be nice prizes - so. it is like a carnival, everyone has fun, celebrates with the bride and groom and helps them at the same time.


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Well, now that I know what a "wedding social" is, I can pass comment.

First let me say that perhaps the bride and groom might consider sitting on the sidewalk at the corner of Portage and Main, he with his hat in hand and she with a tin cup. (Monkey uniforms optional)

I have been to many weddings over the past 40 years in Manitoba, Saskatchewan, BC and Alberta. Many of those weddings had a "pass the collection plate" component to them and we always gladly contributed.

It seems to me the new Manitoba version of a "wedding social" is specifically designed to "double dip" by hosing both friends and family not only at the wedding, but at the "social".

It is in my opinion repulsive and should be abolished as an abomination on traditional marriage. Oh, but wait, the Liberals have already done that.


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## Cameo (Aug 3, 2004)

Sister or not - I am only giving one gift -a wedding gift - and that will be something personal.
I don't really know how I feel about the new buck and doe thing. When I got married they threw me a shower and everyone bought gifts and then there were wedding gifts at the wedding. Don't know why anyone needs more than that.
I was grateful for everything but quite capable of doing what is my choice on my own. The buck and doe sounds like fun for everyone, as posted earlier kind of like a carnival only knowing where the money is going. At the same time it feels like a money grab. People going to these, though, know what is up so it is still everyone's choice and they can go home with something for themselves too.


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## Wolfshead (Jul 17, 2003)

thejst said:


> see you at your next thread then....


Do you really feel mature enough to marry?


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## Digital_Gary (Sep 18, 2003)

Seriously? Haven't more people been to a buck and doe? The isn't exactly a new thing to me and most of the people I know. Maybe it's because I grew up in the counrty and didn't have much to do. I've been to tons of these. It is a chance to see a bunch of people you haven't seen in a long time. You dance, play games, win prizes and the majority of the time it turns into a huge pissfest. Don't tell the FW but I am looking forward to this more than the wedding reception  

A good time is had by all and you are helping the soon to be newlyweds. It isn't meant to be a collection plate and that defintely isn't the mood.


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## iPetie (Nov 25, 2003)

A wedding social is no different than the girls getting together for a wedding shower and the boys getting together for a stag. Raising money or gifts for the Bride at a Shower is perfectly acceptable. I have been to Stags where the same is true but more from a cash perspective. The guy part seems a little more defined by different cultures from a money raising standard.
So, the combination into one party is perfectly acceptable if the previously mentioned are acceptable.
Different strokes for different folks! Right?

I'd go with the iPod. Generally groups of friends have some common link. Be it camping or music or whatever. Try to define something that has some value based on the common denominator.

Best of Luck, and have fun! In the end, that is what it is all about.


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## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

Wolfshead said:


> Do you really feel mature enough to marry?


Another derailment...Just let it go will you?


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## Kosh (May 27, 2002)

I think too much emphasis is being put on the money thing. It's more about getting together and partying than the money. I think alot of relatives would be more miffed if the social didn't happen, then if it did. 

And I'm gonna make a suggestion here. Unless you make at least 2 suggestions about a auction item, I don't think you should post to this thread!


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## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

thanks Kosh for your support!
Picked up a couple of things today
a well-priced digicam
a texas-holdem poker set
a cordless phone....

looks as if Best Buy is giving away free mp3 players with a Telus phone deal, so I may take them up on it....

so far so good...


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## Kosh (May 27, 2002)

Sounds like you found a few good items... didn't think of the cordless phone. That's a good general item.


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## thejst (Feb 1, 2005)

I figure everyones cordless dies after a year or 2...nice to have new one....

The most interesting though, A local chef has offered one of his new cookbooks and to go and cook dinner for 4 using recipes from it in their home....That should be cool me thinks...


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## depmode101 (Sep 4, 2002)

at a friends wedding, he got the wedding party men money clips as a gift - http://www.moneyclips.ca


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## esthetician (Jun 22, 2007)

SINC said:


> Well, now that I know what a "wedding social" is, I can pass comment.
> 
> First let me say that perhaps the bride and groom might consider sitting on the sidewalk at the corner of Portage and Main, he with his hat in hand and she with a tin cup. (Monkey uniforms optional)
> 
> ...






Wedding socials are for your friends and family to all get together, dance have some drinks and see people they havent seen in a long time! The couple getting married, or the couples family, pays for the hall to hold the social, the dj and the alcohol. Now it depends if your group are heavy drinkers, if they are, you will make your money back, if they arent than you dont. Its an excuse for people to have a good time winning prizes and socializing! Hence the word SOCIAL! So say you spend $50 at this social, $10 on the ticket and the rest on a couple drinks and maybe a raffel ticket, once you show up to the wedding, the normal amount people usually pay is $100 with a card (per person you show up with) Instead of paying $250 or whatever else kind of amounts that you pay to go to a wedding. Also, not everyone wants a large wedding, they just invite family and close friends, but still want to include other people to celebrate with their happiness, thats what a social is for. So in the end, I'd say paying $150 (between the social AND the wedding) it is alot cheaper for people to attend weddings in Winnipeg, and the people getting married actually arent making as much. Think about that, $250 just to go to a wedding, and we pay $150 to have an amazing time at both. 
So for all of you out there that are downing socials, you're just jealous because you're tight asses that dont know how to have a good time, and think that spendin a little bit of money to have a good time is wrong... money isnt everything in this world!


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## FeXL (Jan 2, 2004)

Holy revived thread, Batman!


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## JumboJones (Feb 21, 2001)

I'm always game for the Texas Mickies, haven't won one yet. 

FYI, if your going to games, I'd avoid Blackjack, way too easy to win, I've seen some people win and go, which is bad for business. A game that I've seen to be sucessful is the "Whack Off". It's basically hammering a nail into a railroad tie, the person with the least number of whacks by the end of the night wins something.


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## memyselfandi (Aug 28, 2007)

Im not sure when your wedding is, but im hoping that i get to post before the big day. 
I just went to a wedding social in manitoba last weekend. I am from there, but havent been back in awhile. The tickets cost $10 each, the auction tickets were for smaller prizes 10 for $5, the larger ones were 2 for $5. There was a 50/50 draw, winner recieved $135. Tickets were one arm length for $5.
So, i spent $10 on my ticket, $15 on tickets for the Auction, and $5 on the 50/50 draw. (Total $30). There was a bar there, and good music. I spent my money, and won the 50/50 draw (yea for me!!!) The bar tickets were cheap, but i wasnt drinking...(had to drive.) i had a great time!!!!!!! There were so mnay different kinds of people there, grandparents, aunts unlces, cousins, friends....a good time was had by all...
now...to the point...the prizes...
THey had some great prizes, for the larger ones, they had a bar fridge, with some glasses, cooler, beer sleeves, they had a his and her bike set, BBQ with utentils and umbrella. They were great prizes. 
The only money i had to put out was the $10 for the ticket to get in. Which was my choice...then i chose to spend the rest of the money i spent to help the bride and groom, and to have fun myself...imagine if i had walked out with the bar fridge, and the 50/50 draw....well anyway, if you are putting down a social, you have your head up your ass, obviously you have never been to one, and family and friends usually like to help the bride and groom. They know how expensive a wedding can be.:clap:


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## singingcrow (May 6, 2005)

Wow! Wedding socials are very different then the ones I've been to. There we just went and partied and drank a lot, and if there happened to be a well known band there tickets were of course much higher, but the point was just to party. That was on the other side of the Ontario boarder though.

Hmmm. Has anyone suggested auctioning off kisses yet? People like kisses. :love2:


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## annaliese (Jul 27, 2008)

*if you dont know then dont talk..*

socials are so much fun...they are better than going to a club which most of the people that go would be going to anyways...all your friends are there, lots of times you meet people that you havent seen in years, lots of people win awesome prizes! so of course you want to repay the bride and groom for showing you such and awesome time. socials are a great manitoba tradition, you can think what you want but i dont think its fair to trash something you dont even know about. i know i look forward to at least one social of the year! its not money grabbing...its the exact same thing that you would do at a club, buying drinks, possibly playing slots, dancing etc....except the money is going for something worth while, making your friends special day even better! its just one more great memory to add to the whole affair. if people felt that it was a scam or unfair no one would show up but the fact is they are insanely popular...because people have a great time. anyways i cant say enough good things about socials! and i know mine coming up this new year is going to be amazing! 

but back to ideas for prizes...

a gift basket with maybe like a really nice bath rob, massage oils and those wooden massage things and gift certs. to a spa (for the ladies)

a picnic basket with a nice set of wine glasses, table cloth, wine and some gormet cheeses (again for the ladies or the romantic men)

obviously electronics...those are always a big hit

for mine i was going to do a box set of the gangster movies (scarface, american gangster, casino, carlitos way..you can get it at zellers) and some gift certs to the theater and some scarface apparel..(i know a lot of gangstas lol!)

videogames, rock band, guitar hero etc.

you could probably do like a designer purse like guess or baby phat for the girls again....

hmmm my ideas are very young...so i dunno if thats helpful

you can get cheap bbqs at superstore that are really nice..probably get cheaper at the end of the season...

SOCIAL ARE WICKED!!!! GO HOME HATERS!!!


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## kps (May 4, 2003)

^^^
Must be a switcher...


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## chas_m (Dec 2, 2007)

I've been to many different kinds of weddings in the states, from Orthodox Jewish to Greek to Athiest to Nudist -- have NEVER heard of this "buck & doe/stag & doe" social business.

And I'll keep my opinions on it to myself and simply wish thejst and his bride well.

As for a big-ticket item for the silent auction, hmmm: what about an AppleTV? Although it _does_ require a bit of explaining to a non-Mac crowd, I'm assuming these are reasonably middle-class or upscale people that are coming, yes? If so, I've yet to meet someone who didn't get one and love it shortly thereafter.

Another suggestion appropriate to the wedding and beyond is a really good digital camera. You might not want to go all the way to DSLR, but a really good Canon Powershot SX100 IS can be had for under $250 on sale, and it's a great camera.


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## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

kps said:


> ^^^
> Must be a switcher...


You're absolutely correct. But what did she switch from, and to?


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## kps (May 4, 2003)

chas_m said:


> And I'll keep my opinions on it to myself and simply wish thejst and his bride well.


Nice of you...check the original date, then check FeXL's post.


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## kps (May 4, 2003)

HowEver said:


> You're absolutely correct. But what did she switch from, and to?


MSN to Google...:lmao:


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## iJohnHenry (Mar 29, 2008)

chas_m said:


> I've been to many different kinds of weddings in the states, from Orthodox Jewish to Greek to Athiest to Nudist -- have NEVER heard of this "buck & doe/stag & doe" social business.


I have, and they must be stopped!!!

Just another chance for women to control men.  

Plus they absolutely hated the idea of a Bachelor Party. beejacon


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## chas_m (Dec 2, 2007)

Digital_Gary said:


> Big weddings require big money.


Well, not necessarily.

I put on THREE weddings for my wife (an on-air ceremony, a Jewish wedding, and a big public wedding) with a combined total of just under 400 guests for a grand total of around $5,000. The honeymoon was more expensive than the wedding(s).

OTOH, my bro-in-law just spent upwards of $40,000 on his wedding and didn't ask anyone for a dime (he makes a good living). So your quote above isn't a hard-and-fast rule, but dependent on other factors.


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## chas_m (Dec 2, 2007)

kps said:


> Nice of you...check the original date, then check FeXL's post.


Yeah ... um ... well I'm sure they still FEEL like newlyweds!


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## RunTheWorldOnMac (Apr 23, 2006)

Buck and Does are pretty standard; surprised so many people never heard of them. Aside from the money you can raise they are great for those who typically wouldn't be at the weeding to celebrate, a meeting place for the families to get together and what not.

I'm surprised so many of you are getting; maybe after 3 years (when this post first appeared) you have changed your tune. 80) Apparently you guys wouldn't do well in Mexico; the bride and groom basically don't pay anything. The friends do.

A friend of mine in Mexico told me this is tradition; when his sister got married he bought them the rings. Another brother bought the cake. The bride and groom don't really pay for much. I'm sure if you wanted a large wedding, this may change.


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## New Dog (May 15, 2009)

No Kidding, hey Wolf head (or whatever...) you must have a ton of friends ? Obviously you're the supportive type....I agree, if you don't know anything about it, keep your mouth shut. I'm getting married in September, the social is on June 6th, I can't wait to get together will all my friends that I either a) haven't seen in months/years because we're so busy with day to day lives, and b) friends who have moved away and coming in for this event and finally c) friends I see every other day who love and support me and my future husband. If I could put on this party for free....I would.
Again, wolfy, you probably won't answer this because you're out there "livin it up" with all your buds.
Have fun!
tptptptptptptptp


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## kps (May 4, 2003)

WTF! Is this thread going to be revived once a year or once every three...?


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## ScanMan (Sep 11, 2007)

thejst said:


> ...not to mention the reggae band we hired, which isn't cheap...


You're in Winnipeg, right? This is where I got derailed - trying to imagine Rastaprairiens.


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## New Dog (May 15, 2009)

what's the difference? is there an expiry date on opinions?


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## tootsies1985 (Aug 19, 2010)

*Socials in winnipeg*

Socials are put on to allow those that cannot make it to the wedding or dinner to celebrate before hand...or to fundraise money for the many different research organizations out there. 

Friends and family of the married couple DO NOT MIND paying 10-15 bucks to go and celebrate with them, and spend 10 bucks to put money in for a silent auction to win great prizes..such as tv, video game systems, movies, nights out, hotel packages, clothing....all depending on the budget of the wedding party. Friends and family of the groom come together before the wedding to meet and celebrate and dont mind if they are helping out with either the cost of the wedding (think of how much it costs just to put on a simple wedding) a honey moon or a down payment on a house!


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## ScanMan (Sep 11, 2007)

kps said:


> WTF! Is this thread going to be revived once a year or once every three...?


Looks like once a year, kps.


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## kps (May 4, 2003)

LOL, I wonder how many kids the OP has by now.


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Never did understand reviving threads that old.


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## RunTheWorldOnMac (Apr 23, 2006)

I was at one last week and one of their friends does Fantasia parties. They donated a shag swing for the silent auction. I'm not sure if it was a Chinese shag swing but it was a shag swing none the less. It had over 10 bids from all differant people. I really should have jotted down the names / numbers of all the voting ladies.


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## eMacMan (Nov 27, 2006)

Wow Zombie wedding receptions. I sense a new Tim Burton movie in the making.


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