# Greatest movie quotes



## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

The American Film Institute is doing another of its "Hundred Best . . " The time, it's quotes from the movies. I don't know what's on their list, but I'd love to know what's on yours.
A few less obvious ones that come to mind (probably paraphrased):

"I'm mad and I'm not going to take it anymore!" ( Network)
"You can't fool me: there ain't no sanity claus" (Chico Marx in "Night at the Opera")
"If you build it, they will come" (Field of Dreams)


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

"Louis, I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship."


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## vacuvox (Sep 5, 2003)

um... Casablanca?

how about...
"Is this testing whether I'm a replicant, or a lesbian, Mr. Deckard?"


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## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

"Look at me, Ma. Top of the world!" This was a classic line from Jimmy Cagney's "White Heat", and exclaimed just before he was blown up atop a chemical tank.


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## agent4321 (Jun 25, 2004)

Matrix.

Tank: Okay. What do you need, besides a miracle?
Neo: Guns. Lots of guns.


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## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

"You know how ti whistle, don't you Steve> Just put your lips together and blow"
(Lauren Bacall to Humphrey Bogart in "to Have and Have Not")


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## bryanc (Jan 16, 2004)

I'll be back.


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## bryanc (Jan 16, 2004)

Just about any line from Monty Python and the Holy Grail is a great quote.


"Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government!"

"Who's that?"
"Dunno, must be a King."
"Why's that?"
"'e 'asn't got **** all over 'im."


"Icky Icky Ptang Zoopboing, Zowie Zing!" "Ni!"

Cheers


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

Die Hard: With a Vengeance.

McClane (Bruce Willis) and Zeus (Samuel L Jackson) are speeding through New York's Central park, which is crowded.

Zeus: Are you _aiming_ for these people?
McClane: No......welll...maybe that mime.


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

> Harry Zimm: I once asked this literary agent what writing paid the best, and he said, "ransom notes."


From "Get Shorty", 1995.

Cheers


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## bopeep (Jun 7, 2004)

> It was at a funny ango ....


Snatch.

When Tyrone is parking the compact and backs right into the van.


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## enaj (Aug 26, 2004)

"Tell 'em Large Marge sent ya!"

Pee-Wee's Big Adventure


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## MacNoob (Oct 29, 2004)

From a terrible, terrible movie:

"anyone else want to negotiate?"


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## vacuvox (Sep 5, 2003)

Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!!


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## Rob (Sep 14, 2002)

Go ahead, make my day! (Dirty Harry)

It's only a flesh wound. (Holy Grail, bryanc is right)


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## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

"Nobody's perfect."
Last line in "Some Like It Hot"


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## MannyP Design (Jun 8, 2000)

> Some day, and that day may never come, I would like to call upon you to do me a service in return.


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## KardnalForgotHisPassword (Oct 14, 2004)

Best quotes? God, where to start. Quinten Tarrinto has to make this list, so here are some of my favourites:

*Pulp Fiction:*

*Jules:* "There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." 

I been sayin' that **** for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a mother****er before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some **** this mornin' made me think twice. 

Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. 

I'd like that. But that **** ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. 

But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd."

*Reservior Dogs:*

*Mr. Pink:* I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips, that's ****ed up. That ain't my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government ****s in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you ask me to sign something that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it, put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And as for this non-college bull**** I got two words for that: learn to ****in' type, 'cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big ****in' surprise. 


*Kill Bill II:*
*Bill:* An essential characteristic of the superhero mythology is, there's the superhero, and there's the alter ego. Batman is actually Bruce Wayne, Spider-Man is actually Peter Parker. When he wakes up in the morning, he's Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man. And it is in that characteristic that Superman stands alone. 

Superman did not become Superman, Superman was born Superman. When Superman wakes up in the morning, he's Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red "S", that's the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears, the glasses, the business suit, that's the costume. That's the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. 

Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent? He's weak, he's unsure of himself... he's a coward. Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race."


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## KardnalForgotHisPassword (Oct 14, 2004)

Nice MannyP, a little Godfather *is* in order:

*Don Corleone:* What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully? If you'd come to me in friendship, then this scum that ruined your daughter would be suffering this very day. And if by chance an honest man like yourself should make enemies, then they would become my enemies. And then they would fear you.

Godfather II:
*Michael Corleone:* I don't feel I have to wipe everybody out, Tom. Just my enemies. 


_[About the unrest in Cuba]_
*Michael Corleone:* I saw a strange thing today. Some rebels were being arrested. One of them pulled the pin on a grenade. He took himself and the captain of the command with him. Now, soldiers are paid to fight; the rebels aren't. 
Hyman Roth: What does that tell you? 
Michael Corleone: It means they could win.


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## däycüs mäximüs (Nov 30, 2002)

blondie in _ the good, the bad, and the ugly_:

"You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. _ you _ dig."


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## Willem (Oct 4, 2004)

The butler in Frank Capra's _Lady for a Day_, addressing Happy MacGuire, who talks in the not-so-grammatically-correct mob-lingo of the 1930s: 

*"If I had a choice of weapon with you, Sir, I'd choose grammar."* 

Great film, great director all-round.


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## Willem (Oct 4, 2004)

And just about every third line in any Billy Wilder film, of course.


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## CubaMark (Feb 16, 2001)

_
Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well.

But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed.

Now the politicians are sayin' "send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a sh*t. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard.

It'll be some guy from Southi takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks.

Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck.

A cute, little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink seven and sevens and play slalom with the icebergs and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil, and kills all the sea-life in the North Atlantic.

So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive so he's got to walk to the job interviews which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids.

And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue-plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State.

So what'd I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure I'll eliminate the middle man. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? Christ, I could be elected President._

- Good Will Hunting -

M.


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## yardarm51 (Aug 26, 2004)

"Klatu Verata Nic*ghrnnn*!!" 
"Gimme some sugar baby."
-Nash (Bruce Campbell) Army of Darkness
Evil Dead III


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

Lord Arthur: "Are all men from the future such loud-mouthed braggarts?"
Ash: "Nope. Just me, baby, just me."

Woo Army of Darkness.


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## gwillikers (Jun 19, 2003)

Robert Duvall: "I love the smell of napalm in the morning", from Apocalypse Now.


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## MACSPECTRUM (Oct 31, 2002)

_
Something's going to happen. Something wonderful!_
2010: Odyssey II

Lena Olin: _Have you been waiting long?_
Robert Redford: _All my life_
Havana


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## The Doug (Jun 14, 2003)

"I'm a MAN!"

"Nobody's perfect!"

Jack Lemmon & Joe E. Brown in the final scene of Billy Wilder's _Some Like It Hot_ - one of the best films of all time, IMO.


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## MaxPower (Jan 30, 2003)

I posted this in the Shangri-la Clubhouse the other day....


Looper Philosophy
By Karl Spakler (AKA Bill Murray)

So I jump ship in Hong Kong. And I make my way over to Tibet. And I get on in this course as a looper over in the Himalayas.

[said by young Caddy] Looper?

Looper. You know. Caddy. Jock. Looper.

So I tell them I was a Pro Jock. And Who do they give me but the Dali Lama himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald. Striking.

So we go to tee off. And I hand him his driver. And he hauls off and whacks one. Big hitter. The lama. Into a ten thousand foot crevice. Right at the base of this glacier. You know what the Lama says to me?

Gunga. La Gunga.
Gunga. Gunga La Gunga.

So we finish eighteen. And the Lama decides he's gonna stiff me. And I say "HEY LAMA. HEY!" How's a little something ya know for the effort? Ya know?

And the Lama says to me "Oh there won't be any money. But when you die. On your death bed. You will receive total consciousness."

So I got that goin' for me. Which is nice.


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## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

"Tarzan! (slaps his chest). Jane! (slaps her chest)"

"aaaghooo-!!!!" (can't spell it)

Do I really need to identify the movie?


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## since84 (Jan 9, 2002)

"Rosebud"

(If you don't know that one, you don't know films.


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## gordguide (Jan 13, 2001)

Cool Hand Luke: (full of great quotable dialog, by the way):
Warden ("The Captain", played by Strother Martin) to Inmates, after Luke (Paul Neumann) is recaptured for the second time:
* What we have here, is a failure to communicate. *

Young Guns:
During dinner, the ranch hands are poking fun at the newcomer, Billy (Emilio Esteves), who claims to have killed a number of men.
1st Ranch Hand:
* Aw, I'm just hackin' on him. *
2nd Ranch Hand:
* What d'ya kill 'em for Billy? *
Bill The Kid:
* He was hackin' on me. *

Scarface:
Mel, the crooked cop, demands return tickets to London for him and his wife from Tony Montana (Al Pachino). Later, during a showdown Tony kills Frank and Tony turns his attention to Mel.
Tony:
* How bouts I buy you a one-way ticket to the Resurrection? *

Hot Spot:
The boss's sultry wife (Virginia Madsen) is talking to the new car salesman (played by Don Johnson):
* There's only two things to do in this town. You got a TV? *


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## MaxPower (Jan 30, 2003)

I've roared. And I've rampaged. And when it's all done, I'm gonna Kill Bill.


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## K_OS (Dec 13, 2002)

from The Empire Strikes Back

Princess Leia: "I`d sooner kiss a Wookie!"
Han Solo:"that can be arranged!"


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## MannyP Design (Jun 8, 2000)

^  

My wife's favorite quote from _Empire_:

Leia: I love you
Han: I know

I get her with it every time.


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## Gretchen (Aug 16, 2004)

_We all got it comin' kid._ - Unforgiven


_I'm adjusting your breasts, they shifted all outta whack when you fell._ - Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid


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## Bosco (Apr 29, 2004)

Tuco (Eli Wallach) from the Good, Bad and the Ugly

"When you have to shoot, shoot, don't talk"


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## KardnalForgotHisPassword (Oct 14, 2004)

Gretchen, 

My favourite Unforgiven quote was:

"You just shot an unarmed man!"
" 'shoudda armed himself..."


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## yardarm51 (Aug 26, 2004)

Continuing the Star Wars for a second...

"Awww.... but I was going to Taschi Station to get some power converters."

At university this line always caused the audience to yell out "Shut Up Luke!"


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## K_OS (Dec 13, 2002)

From Akira possibly the best Anime movie ever. I just watched Akira again the other day and this quote stuck in my head in this highly charged scene.

"He's not your friend, he's ours! If somebody's gonna kill him, it should be us!" - Kaneda


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## vacuvox (Sep 5, 2003)

The world is having a heart attack!


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## MaxPower (Jan 30, 2003)

I've got the Poo on me.

- Joe Dirt


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## MannyP Design (Jun 8, 2000)

> You just listen to the ol' Pork Chop Express an' take his advice on a dark and stormy night when some wild-eyed eight-foot tall maniac grabs your neck an' taps the back of your favorite head up against a barroom wall. An' he looks you crooked in the eye an' he asks if you've paid your dues. You look right back at that big sucker an' remember what Jack Burton always says at times like that. "Have you paid your dues, Jack"
> 
> "No, sir, I've just charged 'em."


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## MaxPower (Jan 30, 2003)

I thought this was fitting considering my mugshot. 



> Ah-ah, I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I've kind of lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum - the most powerful hand gun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question, do I feel lucky. Well, do ya punk?"?


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## khummsein (Sep 12, 2003)

"Awww.... but I was going to Taschi Station to get some power converters."

GRRRRRR....why did LUKE get to have all those cool powers?!?!!









oh GOD, army of darkness:

"y'see this? this is my BOOM-stick!"

"you found me beautiful once..."
"lady, you got reaaaaaaaaaaal ugly"

"stop. it's a trick. get an axe."

man that movie's funny...


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## poisonmonkey (Sep 20, 2004)

My name is Gunnery Sergeant Hartman your senior drill instructor. From now on you will only speak when spoken to. And the first and last words from your filty sewers will be sir. Do you maggots understand me?

Sir Yes Sir

Bullsh*t I can't hear you! Sound off like you got a pair!

SIR YES SIR

If you ladies leave my island, if you survive recuit training, you will be a weapon. You will be a minister of death praying for war. But until that day you are pukes, you are the lowest form of life on earth, you are not even human ----ing beings. You are nothing but unorganized grabastic pieces of ampibian sh*t.

Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me the more you will learn. I am hard but I am fair. There is no racial biggotry here. 

etc etc...

Now where is that one from?


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## MacNoob (Oct 29, 2004)

Full Metal Jacket!


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## MacNoob (Oct 29, 2004)

My boss' name is Dave....

'I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that...."


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## KardnalForgotHisPassword (Oct 14, 2004)

poisonmonkey,

You missed the quote from FMJ about being able to suck a golf ball through a garden hose!


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## The Doug (Jun 14, 2003)

"Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich..."

The mind-warp restaurant scene in *Being John Malkovich*.


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## daBoss (Jun 20, 2003)

Big Chill. Jeff Goldblum.

"You can live without sex but you can't live without at least one good rationalization a day". (Or words to that effect)


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## Cynical Critic (Sep 2, 2002)

Two Random Quotes from a favourite of mine:

- Sometimes you eat the bear. And sometimes the bear eats you.

- The Dude abides, man. The Dude abides.

So many more...


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

CC...that one is from the Big Lebowski, is it not?

And does everyone here know that the cruel drill sargeant in Full Metal Jacket was an ACTUAL cruel drill sargeant in real life? For about twenty five years or so?

Trust Stanley Kubrick's penchant for reality to produce a REAL drill sargeant for his edgy war movie.

The guy had ME standing at attention and holding my breath. He was good!


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## We'reGonnaWin (Oct 8, 2004)

_"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."_


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## yardarm51 (Aug 26, 2004)

Martin Short:Hey guys... Look it's the mail plane.

Steve Martin: How do you know it's a mail plane?

Martin Short: Can't you see the little balls?

-Three Amigos

When I saw this in the theatre the crowd was silent for about 3 seconds after the final line. Then one person got it and started laughing and within 2 more seconds the entire place was guffawing.


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## MBD (Sep 1, 2003)

My favourite Unforgiven quote:

"Well, you sure killed the hell outta that guy".

Pulp Fiction: "Check out the giant brain on Brad"

Resevoir Dogs: "Mr. Brown sounds like ****"


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## interact (Mar 11, 2004)

> We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet...I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things...all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."
> 
> - Beverly Clarke (Shall We Dance)


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## interact (Mar 11, 2004)

Yes a remake - this year. Richard Gere, Jennifer Lopez, Susan Sarandon, Stanley Tucci ...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0358135/ 

Truthfully, not as bad as you would think.


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## K_OS (Dec 13, 2002)

Monty Python and the Holly Grail, as Arthur approaches the castle being guarded by 2 soldiers (#1, #2)

S #1: Where'd you get the coconuts? 
A : We found them. 
S #1: Found them? In Mercia? The coconut's tropical! 
A : What do you mean? 
S #1: Well, this is a temperate zone. 
A : The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land? 
S #1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? 
A : Not at all. They could be carried. 
S #1: What? A swallow carrying a coconut? 
A: It could grip it by the husk! 
S #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut. 
A: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here. 
S #1: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right? 
A: Please! 
S #1: Am I right? 
A: I'm not interested! 
S #2: It could be carried by an African swallow! 
S #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow. That's my point. 
S #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that. 
A: Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court at Camelot?! 
S #1: But then of course a-- African swallows are non-migratory. 
S #2: Oh, yeah... 
S #1: So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway...

Laterz 

[ December 13, 2004, 08:32 AM: Message edited by: K_OS ]


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## K_OS (Dec 13, 2002)

More Python, from Life of Brian  

"R: All right ... all right ... but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order ... what HAVE the Romans ever done for US?" -Reg

Laterz


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## elmer (Dec 19, 2002)

> Science ain't an exact science with these clowns
> (12 Monkeys)





> --Attila the Hun. Ivan the Terrible. Henry the Eighth. What do they have in common?
> --Middle name?
> (Intolerable Cruelty)





> You don't throw away a whole life just 'cause he's banged up a little
> (Seabiscuit)





> Marge Gunderson: I'm not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your police work, there, Lou.
> (Fargo)


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## yardarm51 (Aug 26, 2004)

Someone named Beverley Clarke in "Shall We Dance"? Did I miss something? I thought it was a Japanese movie. Did they do a Hollywood remake?


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## MacDaddy (Jul 16, 2001)

"Do I look like a beautiful blonde with big tits and an ass that taste's like French Vanilla Ice Cream?"

From one of my favorite movies  

And from another favorite!

"If the milk turns out to be sour, I aiint the kinda pussy to drink it, Know what I mean?"


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## Mr. Fluffy (Dec 16, 2004)

*Dracula (1992)*

Prof. Abraham Van Helsing (Anthony Hopkins) - "Yeah, she was in great pain! Then we cut off her head, and drove a stake through her heart, and burned it, and then she found peace."


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# where does he gets those wonderful toys?



# This town needs an enema!



#out of millions of sperm, YOU where the fastest?



#.... smells like ....victory. (pause and change of expression) this war is going to end.


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# I 've seen this coming for a while, cocaine is no darn good for anybody.......the future, buddy, the future is grass. I've got 2 tons of tasty coming in, it's on the way.


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## autopilot (Dec 2, 2004)

*you can't handle the truth!*


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# this is between you, me, and the soon to spend the rest of his short life in agonizing pain rapist right here!



# "Dear silly Lars....."



# "I didn't know married life would be so complicated! When you're single, you are only responsible to yourself. Once you're married, doing well on your own is not enough!"


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## Dudireno (Jan 17, 2005)

Take Off Eh!


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# * I tried to think of the most harmless thing
... something that could never destroy us
... something I loved from my childhood.

The Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man! He was on all the packages we used to buy when I was a kid. We used to roast Stay-Puft marshmallows at Camp Waconda!

* Great!!!!! The marshmallows are about to get their revenge.




# All the rich sons of beaches. They still think they own this city. They sit in their co-ops, Park Avenue, Fifth, Beekman Place, snug like a bug, twelve-foot ceilings, one wing for them, one for the help. They think money is going to protect them? Stupid sons of beaches. I'd like to light a bonfire under all their lily-white arsses. Let them see what this feels like. Let the whole Third World see the smoke and come after them. Let them feel what it's like when every Puerto Rican, Iranian, Cuban, North Korean, Chinese, Albanian, Filippino, black man from every corner of every borough -- you don't think the future knows how to cross a bridge? 

Alright. Now this is what we're going to do. We're going to turn this thing around. If it kills us. We're going to prove to these black motherfathers -- excuse my language, Howard... We're going to prove to these ******* that this administration loves them.


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# The duty officer asked General Ripper to confirm the fact the he had issued the go code and he said, "Yes gentlemen, they are on their way in and no one can bring them back. For the sake of our country and our way of life, I suggest you get the rest of SAC in after them, otherwise we will be totally destroyed by red retaliation. My boys will give you the best kind of start, fourteen hundred megatons worth, and you sure as hell won't stop them now. So let's get going. There's no other choice. God willing, we will prevail in peace and freedom from fear and in true health through the purity and essence of our natural fluids. God bless you all." Then he hung up. We're still trying to figure out the meaning of that last phrase, sir. 

*There's nothing to figure out General Turgidson. This man is obviously a psychotic. 

* Well, I'd like to hold off judgment on a thing like that, sir, until all the facts are in.


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## goobertech (Jan 24, 2005)

"ok now I'm coming out , if I see any man on the street Im going to shoot him and if anyone takes a shot at me I'm going to shoot him then I m going to come back , shoot his family , shoot all his friends , kill his dog and burn his house down is that clear ". ----Unforgiven


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## goobertech (Jan 24, 2005)

"and if your wrong you'll have the coka-cola bottle'n company to answer to"
DR Strangelove


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# you can pretty much milk anything with nipples.
could you milk me?


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# Those who can't do, teach, and those who can't teach, teach gym. And those who couldn't do anything, I think, were assigned to our school.




not a fact, but truely funny


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## Ramboman (Dec 13, 2004)

"You should not drink and bake"


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## da_jonesy (Jun 26, 2003)

I'm surpirised we missed these...

"Damn you, Damn you all to Hell!"

or 

"get your hands off me you damn dirty ape!"


Although I did see a line from Soylent Green earlier on.


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## da_jonesy (Jun 26, 2003)

*And what of Kevin Smith?*

Loki when talking to the nun...

That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter," that's an indictment of organized religion. The Walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or with his tusks, the Hindu elephant god Lord Ganesha. Now, that takes care of your Eastern religions. Now, the Carpenter, which is obviously a reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son. He represents the Western religions. Now, in the poem, what do they do? What do they do? They dupe all these oysters into following them, and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en mass. Now, I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths, based on mythological figures insures the destruction of ones inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions, by inhibiting our decisions, out of, out of fear of some intangible parent figure that shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says, "Do it . . . do it and I'll fu**in' spank you!"

or...

Loki:
You got to read at Sodom and Gomorrah. I had to do all the work.

Bartleby:
What work did you do? You lit a few fires.

Loki:
I rained down sulfur, man. There's a subtle difference.

Bartleby:
Oh, okay, I'm sure.

Loki:
Hey, you know, fu** you man. Any moron with a pack of matches can set a fire. Raining down sulfur is like an endurance trial. Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in . . . next to soccer.


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

# we 'll separate the weak from the strong,
the men from the boys,
and the awfully feminine from the possibly Canadian.


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## macuserforlife (Oct 30, 2004)

Leslie Nielsen in The Naked Gun:

"Since I met you I've seen things I've never noticed before
Birds singing.....
Dew glistening in the morning sun....
Traffic Lights...."

Conversation in the movie Airplane:
boy: "I have a question"
Ted Stryker: "A question, what is it?"
boy: "It's an interrogative statement designed to test knowledge, but that's not important right now"
(and every other "but that's not important right now joke from the movie!)

And I promise to lose all faith in humankind if anyone can place this one
"Those cats was craazy man"


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## da_jonesy (Jun 26, 2003)

macuserforlife said:


> Conversation in the movie Airplane:
> boy: "I have a question"
> Ted Stryker: "A question, what is it?"
> boy: "It's an interrogative statement designed to test knowledge, but that's not important right now"
> (and every other "but that's not important right now joke from the movie!)


That is a great one as is...

"You ever watch gladiator movies Timmy?"


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

another thread made me think of this long lost thread. And, as long as we have youtube.....




" I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate.
All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. 
Time to die "

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRY6fO8AajE


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## Macified (Sep 18, 2003)

Ladies and Gentlemen, I have been to the Great Wall of China. I have seen the pyramids of Egypt. I've even witnessed a grown man satisfy a camel. But never in the history of dodgeball have I seen anything like this.


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## K_OS (Dec 13, 2002)

James Bond="do you expect me to talk Goldfinger?"
Goldfinger="no Mr Bond I expect you to die!"

Laterz


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## mrjimmy (Nov 8, 2003)

Evelle: Do these balloons blow up into funny shapes?
Hayseed shopkeeper: Depends on if you think round's funny.

Raising Arizona


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## RevMatt (Sep 10, 2005)

Yippee-kai-ay, Mother******!!


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## Greenman (Feb 22, 2003)

"You're in it now, up to your neck"

Gregory Peck - Guns of Navarone


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Gaston - that's one of my favourite scenes - wonderfully done in the rain. :clap:

It's brilliant writing - anyone know if it's orginal to the book??


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## Kazak (Jan 19, 2004)

Merlin in _Excalibur:_

When a man lies, he murders some part of the world.

Random party guest to Donald Sutherland in _Ordinary People:_

I'm not talking to you.

And no one's claimed this one yet (you all know the movie):

We're on a mission from God.


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## RatsOnMacAttack (Mar 5, 2005)

"No more rhymes now, I mean it!"
".....anybody want a peanut?":heybaby: 


"Is it true. boy? Did you kill the Sherriffs deer?" "Hundreds of'em! "



oh yeah, i almost forgot..."KHHHHHAAAAANNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!":lmao:


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

MacDoc said:


> Gaston - that's one of my favourite scenes - wonderfully done in the rain. :clap:
> 
> It's brilliant writing - anyone know if it's orginal to the book??



actually, Rutger Hauer came up with those lines. he wrote them, showed them to the Director, and with the writer's blessings, they stayed there. 
Interesting is that on an interview, when Rutger remmines... reminiscents on this lines, he repeats them differently. That shows what he was going for at the time.
He says : "if you've seen what i've seen with YOUR eyes". NICE


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know." Animal Crackers - 1930.


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

I do not avoid women, Andre. But I do deny them my essense

<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ekw3XVq1uHs"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ekw3XVq1uHs" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>






"Regrettably yes, but it is you know a sacrifice required for the survival of the human race"



<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/UeqfHZ0VV7g"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/UeqfHZ0VV7g" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>


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## MannyP Design (Jun 8, 2000)

From The Way of the Gun:

Chiddick: Do you believe in karma?
Sarmo: Karma's justice without the satisfaction. I don't believe in justice.

~

Longbaugh: I've... never killed a man. 
Interviewer: I beg your pardon? 
Longbaugh: I said I never killed a man. 
Interviewer: I didn't ask if you had. 
Longbaugh: You asked why I thought I was qualified, I think of that as qualification. 
Interviewer: And I'm just wondering why that in particular strikes you as an important qualification for semen donation. 
Longbaugh: I would say thats a big f*ing qualification - excuse me, a very _important_ qualification. 
Interviewer: No one's ever said that before. 
Longbaugh: Have you ever asked? 
Interviewer: No. 
Longbaugh: You _should_.


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## Bjornbro (Feb 19, 2000)

"With all due respect..."
"It's showtime"
"Let's get outta here!"
All three quotes are from any major movie released in the last 20 years. XX)


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## Beej (Sep 10, 2005)

Chiun: The trained mind does not need a watch. Watches are a confidence trick invented by the Swiss.
.........................
Remo Williams: Chiun, you're incredible! 
Chiun: No, I am better than that.
.........................
Remo Williams: Do you always talk like a Chinese fortune cookie? 
Chiun: [striking Remo] Chinese! I am Korean. Korean is the most perfect creature ever to sanctify the earth with the imprint of its foot.


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## yo_paully (Sep 20, 2004)

Probably one of the most quotable movies of all time... Christmas Vacation.


*Clark:* Can I refill your eggnog for ya? Get ya something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere, leave you for dead?
*Eddie:* Naw, I'm doing just fine Clark
clip


*Clark:* Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no! We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here! We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f*****g Kaye! And when Santa squeezes his fat white a** down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of a**holes this side of the nuthouse!
clip


*Clark:* Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, d***less, hopeless, heartless, fat-a**, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey s**t he is! Hallelujah! Holy s**t! Where's the Tylenol?
clip


*TV Parade Announcer:* Boy, these gusty winds appear to be playing havoc with the giant nutcracker float. At this point, I can't even see the nuts. They must have blown away.
clip


*Eddie:* Well, don't go putting none of that stuff on my sled Clark. You know that metal plate in my head?
*Clark:* Ah! How could I forget?
*Eddie:* I had to have it replaced, because everytime Cathrine revved up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about a half-hour or so. So, over at the VA, they had to replace it with a plastic one. It ain't as strong. So, hahaha, I don't know if I ought to go sailing down no hill with nothing between the ground and my brain but a piece of government plastic.
*Clark:* You really think it matters Eddie?"
*Eddie:* Well, see the plate runs right underneath the part here. See, over here, nothing. But, here if this gets dented, then my hair just ain't going to look right.
clip


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

And who could forget Eddie when he uttered that immortal line: 

"Every time Catherine would turn on the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour."


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## MissGulch (Jul 20, 2005)

"Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don't they?" ~Strawman, from "The Wizard of Oz."
"What we've got here is failure to communicate." ~Strother Martin from "Cool Hand Luke."
"I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore!"~Peter Finch, "Network"
"I have always depended on the kindness of strangers." ~Vivian Leigh in "A Streetcar Named Desire"


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## audiodan (Sep 26, 2005)

"Let's Do It for Johnny!" Said by Dally in S.E. Hinton's The Outsiders.


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## Oakbridge (Mar 8, 2005)

Beware of language:

Crash Davis: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. 
[pause] 
Crash Davis: Goodnight. 
Annie Savoy: Oh my. Crash...

and who can forget:

Harry Doyle: JUST a bit outside. 

and of course:

King Louis XVI: It's good to be the king! 

Moses: The Lord, the Lord Jehovah has given unto you these fifteen... 
[drops one of the tablets] 
Moses: Oy! Ten! Ten commandments for all to obey! 

and:

[after Sally fakes orgasm in a deli] 
Older Woman Customer: [to waiter] I'll have what she's having.


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## Oakbridge (Mar 8, 2005)

Economics Teacher: In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the... Anyone? Anyone?... the Great Depression, passed the... Anyone? Anyone? The tariff bill? The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act? Which, anyone? Raised or lowered?... raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government. Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects? It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression. Today we have a similar debate over this. Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before? The Laffer Curve. Anyone know what this says? It says that at this point on the revenue curve, you will get exactly the same amount of revenue as at this point. This is very controversial. Does anyone know what Vice President Bush called this in 1980? Anyone? Something-d-o-o economics. "Voodoo" economics. 

and a line that became the name of the special edition of this movie:

Economics Teacher: Bueller? Bueller? Bueller? 
Simone: Um, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious. 
Economics Teacher: Thank you, Simone 
Simone: No problem whatsoever. 

Grace: Oh, he's very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude.

and a great reason why everyone should watch the credits:

Ferris: [after the end credits] ... You're still here? It's over!


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## Oakbridge (Mar 8, 2005)

Mack: [about John Ratzenberger] Hey... they're just using the same actor over and over again. What kind of cut-rate production is this?

Buzz: To infinity, and beyond! 

[Mr. Potato Head watches hopefully as Andy open birthday presents] 
Mr. Potato Head: Mrs. Potato Head, Mrs. Potato Head, Mrs. Potato Head, Mrs... Hey, I can dream can't I? 

Mr. Potato Head: What're you lookin' at, you hockey puck? 

Barbie: And this is the Buzz Lightyear aisle. Back in 1995, short-sighted retailers did not order enough dolls to meet demand. 

Buzz Lightyear: You killed my father. 
Emperor Zurg: No Buzz, I am your father. 

Ham: Excuse me. Could any of you ladies tell us where we can find the Al of Al's Toy Barn? 
Tour guide Barbie: I can. I'm Tour Guide Barbie. Please keep your arms in the car at all times, and no flash photogtaphy. Thank you. 
Mr. Potato Head: I'm a married spud, I'm a married spud... 
Ham: Then make way for the single fellas. 

[Hamm's cork has popped out and there is change all over the sidewalk] 
Hamm: All right, nobody look till I get my cork back in.


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## rondini (Dec 6, 2001)

"Snakes, why did it have to be snakes?"

"Asps, very dangerous! You go first"

and from funniest movie ever,

"Werewolf!" 
"Where wolf? There, wolf. There. castle!"
---
"would you help with the bags, Igor?"
"Sure, you get the blond and I'll get the one with the mink!"
---
I am Frau Blucher!"
--
"Wait-t, wait-t! I was gonna make espresso!"
---
"ooohh sweet mystery of life at last I've found you!!!"


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## zoziw (Jul 7, 2006)

From Peter Pan:



> Mrs. Darling: There are many different kinds of bravery. There's the bravery of thinking of others before one's self. Now, your father has never brandished a sword nor... nor fired a pistol, thank heavens. But he has made many sacrifices for his family, and put away many dreams.
> 
> Michael: Where did he put them?
> 
> Mrs. Darling: He put them in a drawer. And sometimes, late at night, we take them out and admire them. But it gets harder and harder to close the drawer... and he does. And that is why he is brave.


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## bryanc (Jan 16, 2004)

I can't believe no one has posted what is probably the most famous single line in movie history:

"Bond. James Bond."

As delivered by Sean Connery, of course.

Although, to be fair, I thought Pierce Brosnan pulled it off fairly well too.

Cheers


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## bryanc (Jan 16, 2004)

*Another good one:*

Terminator: "I'll be back."


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

"write it down, put a stamp on it, and mail it to somebody who gives a fack"


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## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

My personal favourite from North by Northwest (1959)

Eva Marie Saint (Eve): I'm a big girl.

Cary Grant (Roger): Yeah, and in all the right places, too.


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## MaxPower (Jan 30, 2003)

Some of my Favourite Wil Ferrel quotes:

From Anchorman:
Veronica Corrnerstone: Mr Burgundy! You have a massive erection!
Ron Burgundy: Pretty impressive isn't it?

From Talledega Nights:
Ricky Bobby: If you're not first, you're last.


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## gastonbuffet (Sep 23, 2004)

....he was my north
my south, my east and west
my working week
and my sunday's rest...



John Hannah delivers beautifully.


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## anal-log (Feb 22, 2003)

I feel the need......the need for speed.


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