# George Carlin on transhumanism



## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

In light of the threads "Imparticular" and "My Bad," here's a rant by George Carlin, as performed on _The Tonight Show with Jay Leno_.



> "I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up-linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multitasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond!
> 
> "I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice-activated and biodegradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
> 
> ...


George Carlin


----------



## RevMatt (Sep 10, 2005)

My, but he IS a funny man


----------



## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Saw him do that one live. Very good!


----------



## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

: )


----------



## Ottawaman (Jan 16, 2005)

He should put it to music.


----------



## Macfury (Feb 3, 2006)

"Cake" should write the music.


----------



## MACSPECTRUM (Oct 31, 2002)

i swear that's a Ballmer speech


----------



## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Written by George Carlin, soon after his wife died.

"The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom,
and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete.

Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because
that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the
only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, "I love you" to your spouse and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number of breaths we
take, but by the moments that take our breath away."


----------



## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Thank you for that Dr. G. It brought a tear. :-(


----------



## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Sinc, I thought that of all people here in ehMacLand that might appreciate this letter, it might be you. Paix, mon frere.


----------



## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

Dr.G. said:


> Written by George Carlin, soon after his wife died.
> 
> "The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
> ...


Nope, not so fast, Dr. G.

As always, snopes.com rules:



> George Carlin very emphatically denied he had had anything to do with "Paradox," a piece he referred to as "a sappy load of ****," and posted his comments about being associated with this essay on his own web site.


http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/paradox.asp#carlin


----------



## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

HowEver, I am sorry to hear that George C. did not write this piece. It is still a fine sentiment, regardless of who wrote actually wrote this essay.


----------



## SINC (Feb 16, 2001)

Dr.G. said:


> HowEver, I am sorry to hear that George C. did not write this piece. It is still a fine sentiment, regardless of who wrote actually wrote this essay.


Agreed, it's the message that counts.


----------



## BerlinerCa (Nov 22, 2005)

Lots of George Carlin stuff here on youtube, including the piece that starts this thread.

http://www.youtube.com/results?search=george+carlin&search_type=search_videos&search=Search

His take on religion is pretty funny too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv2yXh6pTDY&search=george carlin


----------



## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

"Agreed, it's the message that counts." Very true, Sinc. Very true.


----------



## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

...


----------



## Macfury (Feb 3, 2006)

But Carlin says the speech contains some truth and is STILL a sappy piece of ****.


----------



## HowEver (Jan 11, 2005)

Macfury said:


> But Carlin says the speech contains some truth and is STILL a sappy piece of ****.


Let's give the whole quotation then shall we?

From George Carlin's site:
http://www.georgecarlin.com/home/dontblame.html



> "PARADOX OF OUR TIME"
> One of the more embarrassing items making the internet/e-mail rounds is a sappy load of sh-it called "The Paradox of Our Time." The main problem I have with it is that as true as some of the expressed sentiments may be, who really gives a sh-it? Certainly not me.
> 
> I figured out years ago that the human species is totally f..ked and has been for a long time. I also know that the sick, media-consumer culture in America continues to make this so-called problem worse. But the trick, folks, is not to give a f..k. Like me. I really don't care. I stopped worrying about all this temporal bullsh-it a long time ago. It's meaningless. (See the preface of "Braindroppings.")
> ...


----------

