# The First Annual Soapie Awards PT1 All members please participate



## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

With the kind permission of hizhonnur and based on an rather wide ranging thread between Dr. G and myself the idea of ehMac awards came up. After all there are almost a thousand members now.
Here's the gist.
The Logo
An Inuit carving ( hence the Soapstone awards) as a symbolic ehMac award - perfectly Canadian - look around for a good picture that's appropriate for this.

The idea
"The Annual ehMac SoapStone Awards"
aka "The Soapies"
Every holiday season for the month of December when most are giddy anyway we vote on a few categories to be determined in this thread.

After the categories are determined.
Nominations open, ( yes you can nominate yourself ) accompanied by a brief reason or example ( ie spelling, good advice, best joke etc that prompted the nomination)

Nominations close Nov 30th or earlier if the nomination thread is not added to in a week.

The Mayor and I will not be open to be nominated but all other members are and both nominations and votes will carry through to the end.
Nominees may campaign for votes or not as they see fit.

Voting from Dec 1 to 11th ( allows for those going away for the holidays ). Dec 12th we will announce the recipients and award the icons for the year.
Acceptance threads encouraged - oh BTW we need an applause emoticon.

Each recipient gets a special icon to use online for a year. ( I hope this is technically feasible...Mr Mayor??) 
This will be easier to execute with the new software upgrade but let's get it started. 
We'll try for 3 serious and 3 humorous categories.
Here are a couple of examples and these may not be in the final choice but we need more ideas for categories in this stage - 

Funniest

Worst Speller ( the Mayor has VOLUNTEERED for this award )

Best Tech Advice

?????
???
???

We'll keep it light and fun but it will be a recognition for those that put time and effort into it on the serious side and a gentle poke in the ribs on the lighter side.

Other suggestions concerning the awards or procedure welcome

Category Suggestions with short explanation....let's hear them.


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

How about "Most Long Winded", the member with the highest word count takes it home! Although, without Macdoc to compete, I fear Macnutt may be a shoe in.......

 

--PB


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

Ah, 'twas only said in jest. 

I like that arguement award idea. I second that one.

What about best contributor, the winner being the member who contributes the most all around?

--PB


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## VertiGoGo (Aug 21, 2001)

Sounds cool.







I am all for the awards.

I wish to be nominated for "best speller" for my frequent ability to know when and where to use your/you're and there/their/they're.  Tee hee hee

And I just looooooooooove these new emoticons.


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## Chealion (Jan 16, 2001)

Good idea, I won't win any this time around, but with gordguide back, PosterBoy's got some competition for answering the technical questions 

Another possible award topic could be the best UT player...

Nominations? If I have to nominate anyone, it has to be everyone... you make these things so hard   

Well g/l to all those nominated!


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## Bjornbro (Feb 19, 2000)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Chealion:
*Another possible award topic could be the best UT player...*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yeah, I second that! We'll call it the "I have no life, so I'll call my ehMac buddies to play UT" award. Ha, that one will be mine!


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## used to be jwoodget (Aug 22, 2002)

Shoot, eliminating Macdoc really does open up the field in most prolific use of words per post.

We need more categories (I don't like award competitions where the number of awards is less than the number of potential awardees - the Music Business is really good at this rule, the Nobel Prizes are the worst







).

Here's a few: 

1. Most inane quote (can be taken out of context) (in memory of Trevor Morris)

2. Person most likely to be the last to upgrade to OS X

3. Most applications in dock (me, me, me)

4. Most likely to be Steve Jobs brother/sister, separated at birth 

5. Shortest half-life in an Unreal Tournament fragfest

6. Most likely to visit a communist Carribean Island


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Ahem....now there's a difference between long winded and thorough  - wanna refine that one a bit 
We do need one for Macnutt

Think we need one for best argument which would be a shared award. Macnutt and Cubamark would rank high on that for the Cuba thread.  that was intense


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

I'm killing myself laughing at you guys this is great.








I do need some solid categories however so let's summarize. 
?Check mark equals in for sure.
? mark equals under consideration
?? = almost decided on..

? Best technical advice is a natural category.
? Best UT player also a good idea.

?Best argument ( shared award? ) or perhaps best debater a single award-

??Funniest - overall - sort contributing the most humour to the ehMAc community

? perhaps an OSX category - best OX supporter, best OSX ideas something.....come on

?? Best overall contributor - I guess this falls into one of the BIG awards - I think this is a go unless somone comes up with a better set

Okay need a bit more input for the categories.....something maybe most politcally savvy, or most left wing and most right wing - something in that.

Do we need to split the technical award in any way?

Best welcomer?? The person who takes the time to respond to new users etc. I think only the Mayor would know on this

More please
 - 
anyone find an appropriate Inuit carving picture?


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Oops - no check marks visible - have to use something else
Give me some more feed back and I'll summarize shortly.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Used to be jwoodget wrote "Most inane quote (can be taken out of context) (in memory of Trevor Morris)". Whatever happened to Trevor Morris? I know that he was somewhat caustic at times, but he did have some interesting perspectives on Life.


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## sniper (Mar 9, 2002)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dr.G.:
*he did have some interesting perspectives on Life.*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

so did adolf hitler. doesn't mean he was good for society.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Sniper that was little over the top  
Trevor might have been mouthy and opinionated but he certainly shows no sign of being a mass murderer or political phenomena.  
Hitler was very much a product of a strange historical opportunity.. a charismatic meglomaniac in the right place and time to offer a way out from under the Treaty of Versaille and the disaster that the was the Weimar Republic. Had the allies and especially the French not completely crippled Germany with reparation demands and appropriations it's unlikely Hitler would evr have been more than a house painter.

Anyway Trevor added a bit of spice to the community which I didn't mind and I think Dr. G found amusing as well. You volunteering to fill in for him?


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macdoc, I wouldn't say that I found Trevor M. "amusing", although interesting and very opinionated would be an appropriate description. Still, whatever happend to him?

And would SOMEONE tell me how to post a picture on to this forum????? Macdoc deserves to see what happened to his award after my two doxies go to it prior to shipping!!!


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## sniper (Mar 9, 2002)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by macdoc:
*Sniper that was little over the top*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

i agree. that was the idea; satire.

i do, however, still believe he was a drain on the ehmac community, and didn't bring anything good to the table that our other members don't already bring.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

The fact remains -- Where is he??? Has he died? Has he been banned from the group? Has he been driven out of ehMacLand into the land of Nod???


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## sniper (Mar 9, 2002)

i believe the good mayor decided it was best to expunge him


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Alright alright caught me witht he satire radar off.








Can we get one ot two more categories for ehMac awards.??
Most warped viewpoint? 
Most politcally savvy?? 
Most controversial??

If I get these done then we can look at a couple of "monthlies".. Best post. etc. after this which will keep it current and get more people awarded ( especially while GordGuide is away  since his encyclopaedic knowledge is rather intimidating )

So far we have for sure

 Best overall contributor 
 Best technical advisor
 Best UT player 

Some form of these or the few mentioned earlier as possibles - let's finalize these and get on with some nominations.








Best argument ( shared award? ) or perhaps best debater a single award-








Funniest - overall - contributing the most humour to the ehMAc community








An OSX category - best OX supporter, best OSX ideas something.....come on


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## Alesh (Dec 10, 2001)

How about something like "Member who started the longest running thread" or something like that? Additionally I think that the best argument is a good idea, and it should be a shared award. Funniest...? Sure why not... although maybe hard to judge.

Hey look at that I have over 100 posts now! woohoo!


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## sniper (Mar 9, 2002)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Alesh:
*How about something like "Member who started the longest running thread" or something like that?*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

how aboot one for member who made the most redundant suggestion.  

just kidding, alesh.


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## Chealion (Jan 16, 2001)

How about an award for the person who had more posts then the mayor (say back about a year ago when I did)  No, no I'm just kidding...

Now for a worthwhile idea:
The best news reporter (new Apple info etc.)
Most beneficial member
One who sucks up to the mayor the most (Just for laughs)
and last but not least
The Person most likely to turn to the Darkside... (Come with me to Dark Side Luke, Bill Gates is your father... ok, maybe a little corny, but it might work...)


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## mose (Jan 14, 2001)

Just throwing out some categories

1. The ehMac Übergeek

2. The ehMac member with no sex since 1985 (when the Mac came out ... basically ... yeah same as #1)

3. ehMac Weenie Award... goes to anyone using Page Three of the "Come-back" book in arguments (Oh yeah! Says who. Well, your mother does DOS)

4. ehMac member with the most number of Macs ...OK same as #1

5. ehMac member with the coolest handle

6. Any damn female here gets two awards (Editorial note!)

7. Any ehMac member not living at home (Had to make sure the #1 winner doesn't sweep)

8. Best haiku of 2002 ... or any Haiku of 2002

9. ehMac Bandwidth Mojo (whomever put the most jumping bunnies, URL's & pix)

10. ehMac FlameMeister (Best all round singe fest.)

11. Profile Categories:
- worst profile
- best "
- lamest "
- fullest "
-emptiest "


and so forth


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## hayesk (Mar 5, 2000)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by VertiGoGo:
*Sounds cool.







I am all for the awards.

I wish to be nominated for "best speller" for my frequent ability to know when and where to use your/you're and there/their/they're.  Tee hee hee

And I just looooooooooove these new emoticons. *<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


"Love" is spelled with only one 'o'. You're disqualified.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Hmmm this thread is going to qualify for the 'silly season" award








Think I'll finalize and if you want a change bitch by the weekend.

The we can have some monthly fun stuff.
Please post WHY the nomination so others can base their voting accordingly. •••• Mr Mayor we need a secret vote method.••••••

Here are the categories to be finalized on the weekend. I'll consider one more "fun" award. Nominations may begin now...please offer some insight into your reasons for your nomination - thanks  

Best overall contributor - nominate the ehMac member you feel has contributed most overall, maybe they aren't the best in any one category but they offer fun, information and participation

Best technical advisor - nominate the ehMac member you feel helped out the most by being informative and accurate in their technical advice.

Best UT player - not being a player I'll have to leave it to the UT community here. For us poor souls unenlightened please tellus why they are the best UT player

Best debater - nominate the ehMac member you feel made their points with humour, compassion, accuracy and persuasiveness. Detail counts but we want the member who persuades best.

Best Humour - contributing the most laughter and good fun to the ehMAc community From good jokes, to subtle puns to "lightening the mood" this ehMacian is a valuable member. Choose carefully.

Best News reporter - OSX to new systems - nominate the ehMac member who keeps you informed with accurate and timely posts and insights.


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## Alesh (Dec 10, 2001)

I nominate Griller for best UT player... I haven't been with the UT crew for that long, but from my observations Griller seems to be on top the most. Also I believe he is the only one
(of those that I have played) that I have not yet beaten at least once.

NOTE: This will change next year as Griller will be superseeded by yours truly.

And so with that, Griller, I nominate you for the "Keep the UT Award Warm for Alesh" Award.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Yay - nominations are now officially open. More please.
Another UT nominiee??

Other awards??


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## Bjornbro (Feb 19, 2000)

I nominate RicktheChemist. Never have I seen a guy who takes such a beating and still live to smile about it. Good sport and might I add "most improved player" by my standards anyway. I would nominate Griller for most outstanding UT player, but only if Neil Yates (aka Ronin) will officially retire. I might nominate myself for the "most ehMac UT games played" award, sad.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Been away for awhile...

Here are my nominations:

For "Town Wizard" I nominate Gordguide (this is a no-brainer) I have rarely met a human being who is so totally aware of all of the things that happen around him. If the world went for a total sh*t tomorrow....I would want to be within shouting distance of GordGuide. I know for sure that this guy could solve any problem that was presented to him and, with his sage guidance, we would all be back to a civilised society sometime very soon. The coolest thing is this....when he starts teaching, it AIN'T boring! Not by HALF! Keep talking Gord...we're ALL listening. Honest.

For "Wizard in training" or "Wizard's Apprentice" I would nominate PosterBoy...again, a no-brainer. This guy totally amazes me. I wish I knew as much as he does now....at his age. If I did, then I would be one rich motherf**ker by this time. To say that he is a "GordGuide in Training" is NO insult. He's going places, no doubt about it. Someone to watch, fer sure.

For "Town Philosopher" or "Town Thinker" I nominate MacDoc. When he speaks it is truly "Deep Stuff"....and I always feel as though I am in the shallow end of the pool when we are debating. Whatever he posts, it's ALWAYS worth the read. It makes you think. It may even change your opinion of the world in general. He has certainly made me think differently about a number of issues. He also knows a LOT about Mac stuff. Perhaps we could change this category to "Town Oracle". 

For " Most dedicated Macophile" I nominate Sniper. Nobody seems to take anti Mac propaganda and toss it off like him. Dedication is his middle name and he doesn't mince words. If Sniper is on your side and watching your back, then you are in truly good hands. He's got a good aim too! Just ask trevor.

For most enthusiastic at an early age: I nominate Chealion. This guy simply doesn't take no for an answer. Team him up with Sniper and we would have an irresistable force. We need more like him. He is truly a force to be reckoned with. For Macintosh. This is a good thing.

For "Town Thinker in training" or "Phliosopher's Apprentice" (with a nice pragamatic right-wing view) I would nominate Cynical Critic. He constantly amazes me with his clear, and concise take on the world around us. He also has virtually perfect spelling and a near encyclopaedic knowledge of history and literature. Not bad...not bad at all. Especially for someone so young. A good Scotsman. You will go far, my friend. Trust me on this.

For "Most Dedicated" I would nominate CubaMark. Although I disagree with his views on almost everthing political, I just have to admire his dedication to the cause and his tireless energy. He spends weeks (Months!) each year helping people who are not so fortunate as we. He does this without any thought of reward....he just wants to help. For this, he has my total respect. A tip o' the hat to you Mark. You've got my vote on this one.

There are probably several key people I have left out. I apologise for any omissions. These are the ehMac citizens that have caught my attention. I consider it a rare pleasure to have known all of you.

Thanks.

Just my thoughts on this.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macnutt, I second your nominations of Macdoc, CubaMark and Posterboy. All are most worthy candidates in their category.


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

I have never played UT with Neil (Ronin), so I will put out the nimination for BjornBro for best UT player. Everytime I get fragged it seems to be by him!

Best technical advice? I'd like to niminate myself, but on the other hand Macdoc has a wealth of knowledge that I dont concerning older machines, and at least a few OS 9 trick that I don't too. Gordguide is as mentioned above, a veritable fountain of knowledge. Heart and ehMax are also regular helpers in this area. Can it be a group award? I nominate everyone mentioned here save myself.

As to best debater, I nominate Dr. G, his posts are concise, informative, and often funny. Notes to macnutt for his thuroughness.

--PB


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

I appreciate the nomination, Posterboy. "Concise"??????? My wife would have to disagree, in that when I get going, I am NEVER concise. As for concise humor, Calvin Coolidge (US President from 1923-1928) was VERY concise. When someone came up to Coolidge and said that he had made a bet that he could get him to say three words, Coolidge replied "You lose."

I am, however, holding out for the title of The Vaudevillian of ehMacLand. As I tell my undergrad and grad students, it's not required that you be funny in front of a class of students, but it helps.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Okay guys thanks for the MacDoc kudus







but if you read earlier I'm out of the running as is the Mayor whom we all love and admire.
MacNutt that was good BUT I need to have it in categories that are clear and repeatable. Mine are not necessarily the right ones and it's still open to discussion but we do need a clear set. Either fit your comments to mine or refine yours to be a bit clearer. I'd be happy to see the latter as you've covered some good areas.
Others please comment on this. Thanks

UT guys will have to effectively have their own award ( I like the idea of Best Player and Most Improved as well) or have someone more knowledgeable







than me. Suggest we have a UT award post now on a separate thread..maybe the "outsiders" like me will learn and come to pay  Someone want to start it????


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macdoc, if you remember what I wrote back in the Can.Kitchen, you will see that you are the first award winner. 

"I think that we should award Macdoc with the first EhMacLand Award for the Renaissance Person of the Year for Eclectic Thoughts and Deeds (EARPyYETaDs -- which will henceforth be pronounced "Ear/pie/yee/tads", which is the sound that my standard wirehaired dachshunds make when you step on their tail). Kudos Macdoc on this award."

I think that this got the whole idea of the soapies going in the first place. Regardless, you have THIS award. I sent our mayor a digital picture of it, but the flash washed out the face, so I need to take another one.


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## CubaMark (Feb 16, 2001)

MacNutt, thanks for the nod... you get my nomination for "Best Debater" (which, my friend, in no way means I concede any of the points in our arguments! Oh, wait, this isn't argument, it's abuse... Argument is down the hall, 2nd door on the right).

FYI, I'm somewhat cut back on my access from small-town nova scotia, doing long-distance dialup. My participation will rise to the usual level of "constantly" in a few weeks...

M.


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## Bjornbro (Feb 19, 2000)

Here's another category: Most Consistent Poster. Nominations:

• Sniper for using "aboot" instead of about.

• james_squared for starting and finishing every post the same:
Hello,
_subject/topic_
James


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## Chealion (Jan 16, 2001)

Thx macnutt for nominating me for a non existent award at the moment, but quite a thorough analysis.

As for your nominations, I have to agree with them, they're almost perfect.


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## PosterBoy (Jan 22, 2002)

Maybe concise was the wrong word, but you manage to put the right info into posts that are not too short and not too long, and always easy to read. Exactly they way they should be.

--PB
just 2 left


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Posterboy, I guess such postings might be called the "Goldilocks" posts.

Let me be the first to extend my kudos on your forthcoming 1000th posting. Mazel tov.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

I see that my nominations have inadvertently left out several serious contributors to this forum. I have no idea why I omitted Dr. G or JWoodget or Icemakk (or several others for that matter)

My only excuse is that it was rather late at night and I had just gotten home. That's my story and I'm stickin to it, by gar.

I'm working on a new nomination list and will post it sometime this weekend. I really think that the categories should be something along the lines of "Town Wizard"..."Town Thinker"..."Town Crier"...."Local Idiot" (me?) etc. It shows that we are a real community, and in a real community there are always people who are known as the "Town _something_"

Anybody agree with me on this? MacDoc?

Anyone have any other thoughts on this?

Let me know if I'm on the right track, people. If so, I will continue. If not, I will clam up. Promise.  

BTW- Side note to CubaMark....I didn't expect that you would concede to any of my arguments, mi amigo. And you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way! I really enjoy debating you precisely _because_ you don't give up very easily. In fact....you don't seem to give up at all! Cool.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Thanks Sniper! I have always felt that we are on the same side. I appreciate your support!  

Aim true...and shoot very carefully. I know that you will do this Sniper! And I prefer to have you on my side!


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Sorry folks. Inadvertant double post. Now deleted.

(I am not just trying to pad my total...honest!)


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## sniper (Mar 9, 2002)

i'll second that, macnutt.
i like your basis for categorizing

i'll nominate macnutt for best nominator.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

This IS the Town Hall and I have no problem with different categories and nifty names make it fun








Carry on

There can still be lots of time to hash things out BUT we need a voting method and I think it should be private ballot. Public nominations and private ballot for that latter one I need the mayor to offer a solution.
Nominations are a good way of recognition when two - lie say Cuba Mark and MacNutt are in the running.
Hey all those movies still say "11 Academy Award NOMINATIONS". Must mean somethin'


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## Alesh (Dec 10, 2001)

I agree with the naming convention of awards using "Town blah", very appropriate. I would like to nominate myself as "Town Idiot" or "Town Drunk" or maybe "Town S.O.D. (Spaced out dude)" as most of my posts come out as nonsensical ramblings


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## used to be jwoodget (Aug 22, 2002)

I'll second Dr. G's nomination (can't remember what it was for). Reasons: 

He clearly cares about his students

He has the totally foreign (to me) ability to hord $$ in a research account to buy a Mac without any hint of impulse buying. Argghhh. This is uncanny.

He lives in a truly beautiful part of the world except that its really difficult to see how beautiful it is most days....

He thinks chicken soup is the answer to the Romanow report on healthcare (I tend to agree)

He has a really short username

He explains his opinions and why he has them without being an evangelist (we have tooo many of those in Mac-land)

He gets up before most of us

His island is much bigger than macnutts


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Yes, Jwoodget....but it floats in a much smaller sea than mine does.  

BTW-I shall try not to evangelise quite so often in the future.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Jwoodget, I am touched by the kind words, especially the part about caring for my students. This is one thing I pride myself on re teaching.

Re the research grant, I wait and watch and wait some more. These grants come from extra teaching of online students, at $106 per student, rather than a federal or foundation grant. Thus, I spend this money in the same way I spend my own money from salary -- with great caution. When I signed up for this Mac forum, I was all set to buy an iBook. Then there was a technical glitch and the money was there, but it was not accessible. Then, I waited for the glitch to be rectified, and then I waited some more to see the changes to be made to the iBook. Then the iMac came out, then...............you get my point. Still, I have learned a great deal about Macs from the fine members of the Mac community.

You may nominate me for Most Appreciative Non-Mac Non-Maven...........or for the first ehMacLand consulate general in New York City. Whatever, thanks again for the thoughtful comments. They are appreciated.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Jwoodget, Newfoundland and Labrador is a beautiful province, with so much to see and do. Being isolated is a bit difficult, especially trying to get to other parts of Canada. Still, people who come here to visit or stay do so because they want to make the effort. Few are disappointed........other than the research conference on fog. They met for one week here to discuss fog, and had only one day of fog that week. Go figure.

My "handle" is what my students call me, so it's short and memorable.

I go online early in the morning to catch the questions and email postings from my online students. Many are teachers and they use their school computer in their classroom prior to the start of the school day, so I like to have something waiting for them when they log on. It is a strange experience. Last academic year, I became MUN's first teleprofessor, teaching all of my 6 course workload online. I taught mainly from home, but I could have been anywhere in the world teaching, since all I needed was a fast internet connection.

Salt Spring Island has an exotic ring to it, n'est pas? Grammatically speaking, we should be called the Newlyfoundland and the Great and Vast Region of Labrador.


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## VertiGoGo (Aug 21, 2001)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> The best news reporter (new Apple info etc.)
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

This is the award I am gunning for (hint-hint)...well, that and the "Best Speller" award (despite earlier claims that I cannot spell "love" with more than one "O" for emphasis).


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## Letgoofmytoe (Nov 11, 2002)

I think their should be an award for this thread.

I think there should be an award for this thread.

I think they're should be an award for this thread.

I think thier should be an award for this thread.

I think they are should be an award for this thread.


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## VertiGoGo (Aug 21, 2001)

I am sure many of you recognize that the second line is the correct response.

This is my final answer.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Still working on my list of suggestions for the annual Soapie Awards.

So far I have these suggestions....

"Town Wizard" (GordGuide, probably by acclimation)

"Wizard's Apprentice" (I nominate PosterBoy. He's second only because he's half Gord's age. Give him a chance and he'll be out front one day)

"Town Advocate"-best debater or best at persuading with a good, well-researched argument. I would suggest CubaMark for this one.

"Town Sherriff" For this one we need someone who is here every day and could keep everyone in line with the principles of good taste and the rules of ehMac. The mayor and Heart currently do this, so it may be a redundant position.

"Town Fool" Not a derogatory award at all, rather an award for the one who is most likely to lighten us all up and make us laugh. Perhaps "Town Jester" would be a better term. StrongBlade comes to mind here. just wish he was around more often.

"Town Herald" The person who keeps us most informed of the latest gear and innovations. PosterBoy is a good candidate for this one as well. So are several others.

"Town Master Sargeant" The one who squashes any anti-Mac drivel with hard facts and moves with the speed and purpose of someone who is truly dedicated to the cause. Sniper? Chealion? Others? Suggestions?

"Town Scribe" The one who wields the power of the pen like a six foot broadsword whilst churning out pages of pertinent (?) data on a great range of subjects. Hopefully without boring anyone to death. We are talking total word count here. Hmmm....I think I'll leave this one open to nominations from the rest of you. (yikes!)

"Town Thinker" A title that signifies our own home-grown philosopher. Someone who delves into the deeper meanings of whatever subject we are currently on. A modern day Plato with an iBook under his (her?) arm. MacDoc is the only real choice here....although he has declared himself out of the running. Suggestions?

Those are my suggestions at this point. Anyone care to second any of them? Nominations besides my own? MacDoc...what say ye? Mayor? Heart?


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Macnutt et al...I've been really short of time with a staff off on medical leave  Can I "hand off" this thread to a new organizer.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Mr. Mayor, sir? Heart? Capucine? Anyone want to take over responsibility for the nominations and choosing the categories?


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

MacNutt may soon become the oldest person to reach 1000 posts. So, unless the world comes to an end at midnight (12:30 in Newfoundland), we should have a celebration. We should send him a PosterBoy poster of a big Heart, hand delivered by Trevor Morris..........which should send him into cardiac arrest. Luckily, we have a MacDoc in the house. Kudos in case I miss the celebration.


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## Chealion (Jan 16, 2001)

Dr. G, thats just plain hilarious... but thats pretty interesting, and as of posting this post you are 701 posts from that milestone!
But who is going to take over the soapies? I know I won't be able as in the next few weeks school is going to get crazy, as December always go with IB courses in High School.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Chealion, "leave 'em laughing and wanting more" is the credo of the vaudevillian. Hopefully, I may be around for 1000 personal posts. We shall see.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

One more and I will be at that magic milestone my friends.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

MacNutt, from sea to shining sea. Kudos.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Has this idea died completely while I was away? How come? Judging from the four solid pages of replies to this subject there must be some interest out there in ehMacland. No?


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macnutt, while you were gone, everything has changed. My suggestion that -- "I think that we should award Macdoc with the first EhMacLand Award for the Renaissance Person of the Year for Eclectic Thoughts and Deeds (EARPyYETaDs) which will henceforth be pronounced "Ear/pie/yee/tads", which is the sound that my standard wirehaired dachshunds make when you step on their tail). Kudos
Macdoc on this award." -- went to his head. He is now to called "Macdon". You approach him slowly, kiss his ring and make a deal. With any luck, he does not ask you a "small favor" in return. Do not turn your back to him when leaving the room. Do not look him directly in the eyes. Do not try to see his reflection in a mirror. Do not expect to see him in the daylight. Do not show him a Star of David (don't ask why, something to do with a philosophical conversion to Judiasm). Wear turtlenecks around him at all times. Other than that, things are the same.

I accepted my award for ehMacLand's Jewish Vaudevillian, and I have been touring the south side of our fair land. There is even talk of putting me on the one and only ehMacLand radio station, VONL (The Voice of Newfoundland and Labrador). He had a giant transmitter set up on Signal Hill here in St. John's, in the same spot Marconni received the first transatlantic radio signal in 1901. Thus, his words spread forth from coast to coast in Canada, across the Atlantic to Europe, and God knows where else.

Long Live Macdon!!! Long Live Big Brother!!!


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Long Live Macdon!!! Long Live Big Brother!!!


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

The minions of mirth are upon us. Macdon, always remember that "heavy is the head that wears the crown." For, when you least expect it, there will come a day when "we shall overcome". Thus, you may "Cry havoc! And unleash the dogs of war" upon us, but we shall be triumphant. And then, men and women from all over the world shall say that "THIS was our finest hour!" Beware the Ides of Hanukkah.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

"The times they are a changin' ".


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Boys and girls..you are now witness to the HORRORS  ......I say the ABSOLUTE HORRORS....that a SINGLE DRINK of demon screech can inflict upon you.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

The good doctor claims to hate Screech...so I just gotta ask....what exactly is powering his tirade? And where can I get a gallon of the stuff??


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macnutt and Macdoc (aka Macdon....aka don Wirelessoni........aka...........), I hate screech.........but it is the grading season.........so the coffee flows........and soon Hanukkah Harry will come and give all the good little boys and girls Haunkkah gelt and little gifts. Wait, I think that I can hear the pitter patter of his donkeys and their hoofs on the roof..........no, that was just the doxies running around upstairs...................where is my coffee cup................where is that case study.................where is that box I had with all of my salted springs and nuts......................is there a doctor in the house.............is a house a home..............if a tree fell in a forest in the middle of a war and no one came to fight, would you still hear the tree fall.........................if sticks and stones can break my bones, imagine what being run over by a truck might do????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????


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## Peter Scharman (Jan 4, 2002)

Dr G., what kind of coffe are you drinking???? I know some people who would enjoy that kind of halicunatory side effect. Can you see dead people?


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Coffee, heck! I think he should check his furnace for excess carbon monoxide emissions. Or perhaps he has been mixing arthritis medcines with multivitamins again.









Or maybe he is having some painting done in his home without the proper ventilation.

One thing's for sure....we should send an emergency crew out there poste haste, before ehMac has it's very first online casualty.


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Whatever it is it appears to be terminal. Glad he's on an island. 
Least it may not spread to the mainland. Perhaps an enterprising student has coated his paper with a certain banned substance known to cause something in the vernacular called a "trip"


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Message to Dr.G....

"Tune out...turn off...and drop back _IN_"

Please....before it's too late!


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

...........too late.............must make it to.................cannot see...........will try to make it to .................where is my coffee...............no more grades.....I shall try to ....................still want 1000 posts...........tell my wife that.....I wonder what has just taken place.........I don't think we are in Kansas anymore......I have to warn the others.................."it is a far, far better thing I do....".....it looks like Tiny Tom and his little dog Bug Humbar..............no, it's Hanukkah Harry, and all of his minions of mirth and joy....I can't seem to get the water to boil......I forgot the recipe...............where is that cup..................go away doxies.......I fear they are going to circle in for the kill and there is little I can do before......NO! DON"T TOUCH THAT BUTTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now who is a MORON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

God bless us, everyone.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

1000 posts or bust.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

See Spot run.
Run Spot run.
No, no, Spot.
Not on mommy's new rug.
Out damn, Spot, out I say.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

An MUN scientist cloned himself so that the clone could do the teaching, and he would then have more time to do research. Problem was that the clone used obscene language in the class lectures. So, the scientist took the clone to Signal Hill and pushed him off. A security officer saw the whole thing, and called the police. The police arrested the scientist and he was convicted for making an obscene clone fall.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Why are all of my last four posts only reading as 369 for the total posts????????? I demand a recount!!!!!!!!! Count all of the hanging chads and dimples, and you will see that there are more than 369 posts. How will I ever make it to 1000 posts at this rate???


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## Chealion (Jan 16, 2001)

Dr. G, after x amounts of years grading papers, is this normal? And I don't think you're having coffee, that is unless its got an Irish twist... That or maybe... well I'll put it simply, you need to take 5 minutes and zone out entirely, it works quite well. Just ask all them stress addicted Baccaleaureate Internationale (Regular schol gone scary hard, so its basically first year uni for little Grade 10 kids, on an international standard). But best of luck with your grading, and uhh what was this topic?

Oh yeah, I nominate Dr. G for the Canadian most likely to get drunk/high (whatever you want to describe this current state) when its not Tax Season!


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Just a few thoughts here Dr.G, and I mean them with all due respect...

....if what you are doing is simply trying to run up to 1000 posts as fast as you can, then might I humbly suggest that there are better ways to do it than this? I really enjoy reading your thoughts when they are at least moderately coherent. I especially like them when they make me think, and are somewhat amusing at the same time.  

Lately, however......


Plus, I should note here that there is no prize for hitting the 1000 mark. It's just a number. I would hope that content is more important to most of us than quantity. 

Personally, I look forward to your posts. Because of the content. Not the number at the bottom.

Just my thoughts on this.


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## timmer (Aug 10, 2002)

I would like to know if there is a prize for becoming a full citizen? Is there a certain amount of posts necesary for this?


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Chealion, grading is, sadly I must admit, a part of the educational system, especially at the post-secondary level. I would distinguish between formative assessment (i.e., the on-going and informal assessment of progress as the learning occurs) and summative evaluation (i.e., the giving of grades based on a formal evaluation). Personally, I stress the gaining of knowledge in my courses, although many students strive merely for the grades. As the old saying goes, you may lead a child to knowledge, but the trick is to help them to think.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macnutt, fear not, the old Dr.G. is alive and well. I guess I went a bit (?!?) overboard on my last few posts. Actually, if the truth be known, I actually cut back on the amount of coffee I drink in the last month of the semester so that I can get to sleep at night. I haven't had a drink since my birthday (Oct.7th) and I can't remember when I last had something that might get me arrested if I tried to sell it on the corners of Jobs and Woz in downtown ehMacLand. 

Thus, fear not for my sanity. However, I still would like to know what happened to the missing posts. One is not paranoid if they actually ARE watching you.


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## used to be jwoodget (Aug 22, 2002)

I'm getting kinda tired with the apparently unhealthy fascination with post numbers, membership status and awards. This board is meant to be low pressure, low hype and high content. The mayor has encouraged freedom of thought and taken the initiative to reduce competitiveness (such as down playing the importance of posting numbers, membership status and removing the ratings). I like it that way. 

Hang loose people. Once the awards or posting numbers are taken seriously, they lose all meaning. We're all equal here (apart from the mayor who is welcome to his omnipotence because he started the whole thing).

(Sorry, I've just spent a day reviewing the Gairdner awards for international medical research and have had more than enough of professional "competition" for one day....).


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

I would have to agree with you, jwoodget. Ages ago, I questioned why I was not a "full citizen", wanting to know what magic number or initiation ritual I had to undertake to enter the clan in ehMacLand. I was joking about the number of posts that I have attained (and seemingly lost), but I agree that freedom of thought and expression should be the primary focus of our interactions on this forum. Still, being in the running for the Uncle Miltie Award here in beautiful downtown ehMacLand (is there an uptown?) is an honor. However, to win would be right up there with getting my doctorate, being the proud father of two children, getting my Canadian citizenship and maintaining my sanity through the many months of our Canadian winters. We shall see.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

jwoodget, being a cancer researcher should put you up for one of the Unsung Canadian Heroes award. Stand up and take a bow!!!


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

I will second that! And the loud sound you just heard was me smacking my head against the wall for not thinking of this first!

Dr.Woodget _could_ very well be the guy who discovers a treatment that will end the scourge of cancer. This is way beyond cool! He is one of our unsung heroes, fer sure!   

I also agree with the sentiments he expressed re: number of posts or awards. I would certainly not want to see people posting a lot of one word replies to subjects simply to rack up a "big score" of post numbers. What the heck would be the point in that? Awards are a different subject, and I think that several people here deserve some sort of recognition for the contributions they have made. Macdoc, PosterBoy and Gordguide come to mind. There are LOTS of others.

But I do NOT think that we should have any sort of "rank" or the priviledges that go with it. The Mayor excepted....he started this whole thing, after all.

Timmer....you get to be a "full citizen" after fifteen posts. The Mayor does it manually and he is a bit busy right now, so be patient. You are already there.

Personally, I never even notice whether a person is a "new neighbor" or "full citizen". I also don't look at how many posts they have made here when I'm reading what they have written.

It is irreleveant.

What you _say_ is important. How long you have been here is _not_. 

EhMac is a singularly egalitarian and refreshingly honest forum, and I feel very priviledged to be a small part of it. I haven't found anything else quite like it anywhere on the web.

This is a good thing.

Let's keep it that way.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macnutt, from sea to shining sea, we are in total agreement.


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

From both ends of a HUGE country...and from two very different origins (Scots Highlander and transplanted Jewish-American living in...fer gosh sakes...Newfoundland!) all I can say is :

THIS is what makes Canada unique among the countries of the world! We CAN reach a consensus....no matter what our background or our ideology. We can find a common ground that is acceptable to all of us. Politeness and consideration for the other persons point of view are hallmarks of the Canadian persona. The whole world knows this. This is a GOOD thing.   

Don't you think?


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Beep beep...error..error
That should be
"Macnutt, from sea to sea to shining sea, we are in total agreement."
My client in the Arctic would be seriously annoyed just cuz your lakes are bigger and warmer


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Perhaps I have missed your point macdoc. I thought that from sea to shining sea included the arctic. 

As for lakes...the Great lakes are more like inland freshwater seas than lakes. They are also an accident of geography. I have worked and lived in the High Arctic...far north of any Inuit or Dene settlements....and they probably had their own "Great Lakes" in the distant past. 

I also know for sure that they had tropical hardwood trees growing there a few thousand years ago. The fossilised remains are all over the place.

Who knows? What with "Global Warming" and all, we might just see Resoloute or Cambridge Bay turning back nto a resort destination at some point!


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Macdoc, technically, you are correct. However, if Macnutt was in Baffin Island, I still would have said from sea to shining sea. This is just a term that I utilize to describe the connection he and I have geographically and philosophically (to a degree).


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Just giving you guys a hard time - the Artic Ocean is also our coastline and I like to include them. By the way global warming is going, it might just be the place to go in the next hundred years  
I was using "lake" in a sarcastic mode - calling the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans "lakes" just to give us Canadians a sense of how big our country is.
There are days when the elephant gets restless that a fourth lake would be good


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Up to everyone here if they think that the "soapies" are relevant or not.

Personally...I think they ARE!

I think that several of the regular contributors to ehMac are worthy of some sort of award...or an addition to their sceen name on this forum. 

Including yourself, macdoc.

Anybody else with me on this?


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## timmer (Aug 10, 2002)

Just before I go tonight I think on the last page of this thread a few might have taken me the wrong way when I asked about "Full Citizenship" It was truly ment in light, the question that is, and I actually don't care either way. I agree, I really enjoy the attitudes and contributions of most all of you here and hope to continue contributing to a great form.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

Mcnutt, the soapies can't be dead!!! I have my acceptance speech all prepared to accept, in a most humble manner, the Jewish Vaudevillian Award (aka The Uncle Miltie). "Say it 'aint so, Joe!"


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

Don't know about "lakes" but much of the twentieth century literature and most of the airline advertising refers to the North Atlantic as "the Pond".

No way could anyone who has ever seen a map of the world refer to the Pacific Ocean as a "Pond" or a "lake".

It's WAYYYY beyond huge, compared to these other smallish bodies of water.

Drop by and see for yourself!


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## MacNutt (Jan 16, 2002)

BTW....it looks as though the 
Soapies" are a dead issue at this point.

Anybody care to comment on this?


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## MacDoc (Nov 3, 2001)

Ah "pond" is even better. Yes I know how big the damn Pacific having flown across it a number of times.








Well hizhonur seems missing in action and you can't really vote without his methodology input.
You wanna play Wizard of Oz and hand out the "Medals".


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

My "Soapie" for Helping to Revive the Lost Art of the Jewish Vaudevillian award (aka "The Uncle Miltie") just arrived at my door via FedEx. What can I say??????? I am touched and honored. To think that a talented Inuit carver from Labrador could carve a likeness of Uncle Miltie out of soapstone is beyond me. I am truly speechless......which for me is next to impossible. Who to thank first?????? Well, I guess everyone who enjoyed my humor, and even for those who didn't like my style of humor, but did not petition our mayor to "expunge" me like Trevor Morris. To all of you I say "Merci", and that I shall try to make myself worthy of this honor.

Did you hear the one about...............?


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## used to be jwoodget (Aug 22, 2002)

Dr.G., here's a draft of an acceptance speech you are welcome to use (at no fee - actually, I'd pay people to use this).

Dr. G. climbs on stage and stares out at the fans.
"Ahem, Dr. G would like to say, well gee, thanks."
Cut to commercial.

As for the Soapies, maybe in the spirit of the internet, these should be kept virtual. I'd hate for there to be violent demonstrations by Svend Robinson because he wasn't allowed to say his piece or from Miss Canada for us not having a dumb blonde award.

Besides, we don't want to make the Americans look bad by demonstrating an effective and fair voting system, now do we?


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

jwoodget, I tried to post my acceptance speech, but the ehMacLand server said that it would not accept words with over 30 characters. Such is Life. Still, at 109 typed pages, it might have been a tad long for all of you to read. Surficeit to say, I am honored. 

As I have said previously, if someone would tell me how to post a jpeg, I would send a picture of the award up above my fireplace.


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## Dr.G. (Aug 4, 2001)

"Ahem, I would like to say, well gee, thanks."


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